-Board game cafe/bars in tech hubs (e.g. The Mox in Seattle)
digital:
This is kind of a weird suggestion but speedrunners on twitch who average less than 50 viewers are probably really easy pickings here; you can rapidly filter based on who you find attractive / interesting, interact with them in relative anonymity from a twitch account you created for this purpose to test the waters, and go from there.
Rationalist diaspora (meetups, LW, solstice-type celebrations). Swing/blues dances. Dating sites that encourage nontrivial self-description (OKCupid, not Tinder/Bumble). EA Global?
Outside the greater LW-sphere, board game and RPG groups (found on meetup or through game stores), hiking trails, slightly offbeat physical activities (bouldering, cycling, etc.) are where a lot of programmer men can often be found.
Aside from things already mentioned: online gaming (strategy games or MOBAs are my jam, but MMOs are probably the more classic example). Also gaming conventions (PAX, etc.), forums, and so on. I know it can be a nasty environment for women, especially women who let their gender be known through voice chat but aren't face-to-face, but it's also how some nerdy or nerd-interested (but not necessarily technical) women I know/knew met partners. Also, it's a great environment for the advice here: a lot of men are super hesitant to hit on or even flirt/hint interest to gamer women, for fear of coming across as creepy, but would be overjoyed to receive clear, unambiguous interest.
Technical forums also work. I don't know anybody who met through StackExchange or Slashdot or similar, but it probably happens, and it's a chance to get to know how people think and communicate.
For me personally, "hacker" conventions. Some of them are pretty niche or either invite-only or super-expensive, but I've made some good friends (one of whom I traveled with and considered dating) at DEF CON, and lots of cities have similar but smaller (and cheaper) events (though many don't have as much of a party scene as DEF CON). Obviously if you have *no* interest in security they probably won't appeal, but you don't have to work in it or even with it. There are probably similar semi-niche events in other fields, with lots of nerdy but lonely (or at least available) men.
Is the question where a non-technical woman would go to meet *me*, or where a non-technical woman would go to meet people of that description? Because, like, just striking up conversations with people on the street / in the park (not a bad thing to learn to do!) might be a good way to meet me, but it wouldn't select for technically inclined men in any way (although I guess you can infer a bit from clothing & such). Although you can probably skew things a bit with location -- if you're in a college town, you can go hang around outside the math building or something, assuming there's a public space there. :)
Um, for other things not yet mentioned, uh, arcades and pinball places, if there are any near you? As for online... well thinking of myself again, I'm on Twitter and Facebook like everyone else, and Dreamwidth like hardly anyone else, but again these don't provide any sort of filter, although maybe the relatively small number of people on DW does. :P Obviously the LW-sphere provides some filter but has already been mentioned.
Also to some extent the answer may be "get to know your friends' friends better"; that's once again generic advice, but it does provide something of a filter, and these would be people you might actually talk to more or see more than once before asking them out, which you can't really do with a stranger in the park or at the arcade you just struck up a conversation with.
I think this is excellent advice overall, especially in nerdy spaces where guys have usually been socialized to be less assertive and sexually aggressive. I also think that society is pushing men to be less proactive with every elevatorgate story. This creates a sort of vicious cycle: conscientious guys are less likely to be assertive, which means that the average guy who *is* assertive is more likely to be a low-conscientiousness asshole, which makes the experience of being aggressively pursued worse for women, which pushes these norms even further along. If you're a woman in a community where guys are judged for being "pushy" or "horny", you gotta make up the pushiness and horniness yourself.
I do hear from a lot of women that they're simply not attracted to guys who don't have the balls to ask them out proactively. I think that in some cases this is an excuse for being lazy and passive, but for many women it is a real preference that likely can't change. I'm not sure what to advise these women. Perhaps they should show interest in more oblique ways, like linking to a guy's blog post that they enjoyed :)
Straight programmer men, where is the most obvious place a non-technical woman would hang out to naturally meet you?
physical:
-Board game cafe/bars in tech hubs (e.g. The Mox in Seattle)
digital:
This is kind of a weird suggestion but speedrunners on twitch who average less than 50 viewers are probably really easy pickings here; you can rapidly filter based on who you find attractive / interesting, interact with them in relative anonymity from a twitch account you created for this purpose to test the waters, and go from there.
Rationalist diaspora (meetups, LW, solstice-type celebrations). Swing/blues dances. Dating sites that encourage nontrivial self-description (OKCupid, not Tinder/Bumble). EA Global?
Outside the greater LW-sphere, board game and RPG groups (found on meetup or through game stores), hiking trails, slightly offbeat physical activities (bouldering, cycling, etc.) are where a lot of programmer men can often be found.
Aside from things already mentioned: online gaming (strategy games or MOBAs are my jam, but MMOs are probably the more classic example). Also gaming conventions (PAX, etc.), forums, and so on. I know it can be a nasty environment for women, especially women who let their gender be known through voice chat but aren't face-to-face, but it's also how some nerdy or nerd-interested (but not necessarily technical) women I know/knew met partners. Also, it's a great environment for the advice here: a lot of men are super hesitant to hit on or even flirt/hint interest to gamer women, for fear of coming across as creepy, but would be overjoyed to receive clear, unambiguous interest.
Technical forums also work. I don't know anybody who met through StackExchange or Slashdot or similar, but it probably happens, and it's a chance to get to know how people think and communicate.
For me personally, "hacker" conventions. Some of them are pretty niche or either invite-only or super-expensive, but I've made some good friends (one of whom I traveled with and considered dating) at DEF CON, and lots of cities have similar but smaller (and cheaper) events (though many don't have as much of a party scene as DEF CON). Obviously if you have *no* interest in security they probably won't appeal, but you don't have to work in it or even with it. There are probably similar semi-niche events in other fields, with lots of nerdy but lonely (or at least available) men.
Is the question where a non-technical woman would go to meet *me*, or where a non-technical woman would go to meet people of that description? Because, like, just striking up conversations with people on the street / in the park (not a bad thing to learn to do!) might be a good way to meet me, but it wouldn't select for technically inclined men in any way (although I guess you can infer a bit from clothing & such). Although you can probably skew things a bit with location -- if you're in a college town, you can go hang around outside the math building or something, assuming there's a public space there. :)
Um, for other things not yet mentioned, uh, arcades and pinball places, if there are any near you? As for online... well thinking of myself again, I'm on Twitter and Facebook like everyone else, and Dreamwidth like hardly anyone else, but again these don't provide any sort of filter, although maybe the relatively small number of people on DW does. :P Obviously the LW-sphere provides some filter but has already been mentioned.
Also to some extent the answer may be "get to know your friends' friends better"; that's once again generic advice, but it does provide something of a filter, and these would be people you might actually talk to more or see more than once before asking them out, which you can't really do with a stranger in the park or at the arcade you just struck up a conversation with.
Climbing gyms are really high on the list. Also sorts for some level of athleticism.
I think this is excellent advice overall, especially in nerdy spaces where guys have usually been socialized to be less assertive and sexually aggressive. I also think that society is pushing men to be less proactive with every elevatorgate story. This creates a sort of vicious cycle: conscientious guys are less likely to be assertive, which means that the average guy who *is* assertive is more likely to be a low-conscientiousness asshole, which makes the experience of being aggressively pursued worse for women, which pushes these norms even further along. If you're a woman in a community where guys are judged for being "pushy" or "horny", you gotta make up the pushiness and horniness yourself.
I do hear from a lot of women that they're simply not attracted to guys who don't have the balls to ask them out proactively. I think that in some cases this is an excuse for being lazy and passive, but for many women it is a real preference that likely can't change. I'm not sure what to advise these women. Perhaps they should show interest in more oblique ways, like linking to a guy's blog post that they enjoyed :)